How Can I Breakup with My girlfriend of 5yrs who Give me N100k to Travel To Dubai, and marry another lady - Man seek Advise


He said

"I am a 38years old man living and working in Dubai. I came to Dubai 5years ago to work and earn money. I won't lie; I was in a very serious relationship with a lady in Nigeria before I left for Dubai. She was my girlfriend from our youth service days at Edo state 8years ago. We met at the NYSC CAMP; coincidentally, we also served at the same State. Being a Lady from the same village as l, made our relationship very tight. So before I left for Dubai, it was a very big CALL I had to make; the reason being that I know that things may change with time. Even though, deep in my Sub- Consciousness then, I doubted the continuity of that relationship when I entered the plane, but I didn't want her to feel heartbroken! Or that I used and dumped her. I really love her YES! But I never promised her marriage. The little money she gave to me when I was leaving the country (A hundred thousand naira), I have sent the money back to her.

For that 5years that I have been in Dubai, we having been chatting and talking. The problem is that she still believes we are still dating. I expected her to ask me about it. Well! I believe as a woman, she must have someone else in her life; but according to her, she doesn't! Jokingly, I have told her that I don't know the year I will be coming back to NIGERIA; and that it is important she knows. Still, she will tell me that she knows I miss her and that I won't do that.
Sometimes I asked her when she is getting married? And she told me that she is waiting for me! I was very shocked hearing this from someone I have not seen for almost 5years now. I don't know why she is having that kind of thought inside of her.

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Anyway, right now my mother and Sisters helped me to find another lady last year. And since then, we have been talking. And from every indication, they like her. She is a very good friend of one of my younger Sister. She is a pharmacist. I have been talking with her and honestly, she is my kind of a lady. My family loves her too and everything is cool with them.

I have decided to marry this lady anytime soon. I would have been back since January this year, but this pandemic stalled my plans. Our introduction as being slated to hold this December; but my worry is that I have not broken up with the other lady. And secondly, both ladies and l, are from the same village.
What if this other lady finds out that am about marrying another lady? Friends have been telling me to just break the 'ice' to her, but I don't know how to do it without causing much noise. I haven't told her that am coming back, but she will surely know through my friends in the village. I just want to do everything secretly and go back to Dubai without any noise. Please how do you suggest I handle this and it will not cause an uproar? Mind you, I didn't promise her marriage; but I don't want any unwanted situation that will bleed hatred amongst us."

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